Author: amandasexton

I am a wife, mother, writer, and reader. I also homeschool my five kiddos in a very eclectic style, 13 years deep. I am a Texas girl, Orthodox Christian, and l love to cook! I write about nurturing the heart, mind, and body.
faith · http://schemas.google.com/blogger/2008/kind#post · motherhood

One Thing Needful…

amandasexton2 Comments
 
‘Kitchen scene with Christ in the house of Martha and Mary’,  Velázquez, 1618
Sometimes I wonder why Jesus didn’t just speak and make the dinner appear.  Is that what Martha is thinking in this painting?  
The look on her face is very scary.  
I wonder…what does the look on my face say about what I am feeling, what I am experiencing as I go about my day.  
Why do I resist?  
Look how thick Martha’s fingers look, how muscular she appears.  Her sleeves are rolled up, and her head is covered for work…not like the flowing feminine coverings of the other women.  Mary in the background looks beautiful.  
Martha appears to be built for hard labor…in fact she looks masculine.  
But it is the look on her face that gives me chills.  
It makes me want to look in the mirror.  
Her face personifies bitterness… and every woman who has let the exhaustion of work and the weight of womanhood chisel her muscles and strengthen her back.  
I suspect that Martha wants desperately to listen to the Master, to be with him, not stuck in the kitchen with smelly fish.  
But, does she?  
Maybe she is so far gone, so burdened, so distracted, so inflamed with self pity that she wants neither…she does not want to serve, and she does not want to worship.  
Her face screams, “My life stinks.”  
 What story is she telling herself over and over in her mind?

I am tired…
I don’t deserve this…
I am ugly like these fish…
I deserve to be in this kitchen…
I should have known He prefers pretty girls…
My mom was right, life is just work and then you die…
Mary is not all that He thinks she is, I know her, we’re sisters remember…
I am not smart enough to talk to Him anyway..
I am so selfish for feeling this way…
This kitchen is the problem…
I need a new kitchen…
Please somebody…
Help me…

She finally drives herself mad…she can no longer contain this obsession.
“Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself?  
Tell her to help me.”

The story continues,
Don’t you care…
Left me…
By myself…
Help me… 

And His reply, so cutting, so raw, so real, so true, 
so not what she wants, but Everything she needs.
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed,
 indeed only one.”

What is the one thing needful?  Did Martha stop cooking and join her sister?  
I think not…everyone must eat, 
Food needs cooking… 
Clothes need washing, kids need cuddling, husbands need loving, 
Floors need mopping, bills need paying, gardens need weeding, 
Prayers need saying, 
Friends need calling, plans need keeping, books need reading, enemies need forgiving,
Life needs living.  

And I wonder…
One thing needful…
Indeed only one…



       
faith · family · http://schemas.google.com/blogger/2008/kind#post · parenting · pregnancy

The Crying Baby Test

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The Crying Baby Test
A good reminder for me as I go back to Church.  It was difficult to manage my seven and three year old at times.  I wonder what Church will be like adding Samuel to the mix?  My friend posted this article on Facebook and I thought it would be nice to share here.

Below are photos of my Churching. I told my husband afterwards, “Well honey, we did it.  We got another baby born into this world.”  Churching has helped me find closure to a difficult journey, and I am thankful.  What a blessing to be Orthodox!

 

books · cooking · food · homeschooling · http://schemas.google.com/blogger/2008/kind#post

A Few Weekly Finds

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On the Web…

100 Days of Real Food
I enjoyed perusing this website.  Although I may not always buy organic, and I do not stress about that much, I do like cooking real food. This website offers simple ideas and a few free meal plans.  I like simple.  I plan to use some of the recipes from here to plan my menu for next week.

T- Tapp
I recently saw this workout on a website I visit frequently.  The author of the blog struggles with sever Diastasis Recti, and she has found ways to put her body back together after seven pregnancies.  I also have this condition, although not as severe, and I am looking for ways to strengthen my abdomen and put my organs back in place.

I bought the Basic Workout Plus during a Deep Discounted Tuesday at half price.  It is a fifteen minute workout that promises to put my organs in place.  I hope it works.  My week has been crazy, and I have not started it yet.(I guess I could be doing the workout instead of blogging…couldn’t I?) I plan to start this weekend when I have a little more time to myself.

Heritage History
This site is wonderful..it even has many stories you can read for free!  I have used it to supplement Caroline’s history.  Take some time to explore this site.  The prices are reasonable as well!

At the Library  

This little picture book is perfect for a quiet time with a wee little.

Pond Babies by Cathryn Falwell 
As you can see, we have babies on the mind around here.

Baby-Led Breastfeeding 
You would think that by now I would be an expert at nursing…but I am not.  I do ok, but I have been struggling in the evening with frequent feedings and not producing enough during this batch feeding.  I picked this book up, and I have found many helpful reminders and some new things to try.  Yesterday afternoon I relaxed as I laid down with Samuel, tried new nursing positions, and enjoyed some skin to skin snuggle time as well.  Nursing is wonderful when I relax!

  A morning spent at the park and library after an orthodontist visit was just what we needed after an intense first three weeks of school.  My older girls are loving their online classes, but getting back into the school groove after a long summer has not been without its moments of drama. I cannot believe that September is almost come and gone!

family · homeschooling · learning · parenting

Relax and Enjoy!

amandasexton2 Comments

My husband and I knew we would homeschool our children from the beginning.  In fact, we decided that before we were ever married.  We are both second generation homeschoolers and knew we wanted to homeschool our children as well…yes, I was homeschooled (only through high school)!

I left public school at a crucial time, a time when credits and tests are necessary to graduate.  However, my mother took a different approach.  I was allowed to sort of decompress for almost half of my freshman year.  I had to wean off of performance driven education and discover the joy of learning.  This took a wise mother and space.  Many mornings she let me sleep.  Many afternoons she let me read and do housework and connect with my younger brother.  He was homeschooled as well, however he was just starting kindergarten. I am ten years older than him, and that first year of homeschooling for both of us was a year of bonding.  We are extremely close to this day.  I would not trade those days for anything.

His kindergarten year was very different than if he had gone to public school.  My mom read to him a lot, he began a massive collection of knives, he went to the coffee shop with our grandfather, he played dress up a lot, and he played outside a lot.  She did a small phonics lesson with him most days, and she took him and I to the library often.  I remember thinking that he was the luckiest kindergartner in the world.

A few years went by…I got married…

And then I became a new mother, and I started feeling the excitement of teaching my own daughters at home…I love to teach.  When my oldest was four and my second daughter was two I went to my first homeschool book fair.  At that conference I was bitten by the curriculum bug, the one that turns moms into teachers and hoarders.  I was on a high when I left, ready to run home and organize my curriculum and project ideas.  I really wanted to start school early..I really loved the idea of making little students out of my toddlers.

And then there was this friend of mine..this wise woman that was in my life at just the right time.  Her oldest child is older than mine by about three years.  Her advice to me was hard to take, and at times I felt like she was a buzz kill when it came to my homeschooling excitement.  She used to say to me, “Don’t school early, Mandy.  You are going to be doing this a long time…put it off as long as you can. Just do fun things and be relaxed while the girls are young.”  My mom took her side, and I should have expected that.  I experienced her relaxed, relational homeschool style first hand.

After many conversations with my mom and watching my friend with her younger children, I began to warm to the idea that young children do not need to start formal school too early.  In fact, I have since adopted the opinion that formal school should be short and sweet for most of the grammar school stage.

Instead, why not just have lots of fun with the littles… read lots of books, make silly crafts, sing silly songs, eat yummy snacks, take naps together, play outside a lot, and live unpressed. I am glad we have never stressed our little ones with too much school.  As I watch my middle and high school students move on to harder subjects and more demanding schedules, I am happy that they had those years of wonder and freedom.  I am glad I had those years with them as well…oh the memories.

As a second generation homeschooler I have an advantage…I have a different perspective.  I was not pressed…even in high school.  My mom was not super big on schedules and checking boxes.  I did learn to run a house and be a servant.  I also went to college, and I did just fine..well in fact.  My kids will do well also if that is what they choose.  If they can read, write, listen, and have a developed work ethic they will succeed.
     
My highschooler is doing great in her classes.  My middle school student is coming into her own. Did their relaxed younger years hinder them? Did my mom’s relational style hinder me?  Certainly not.

So, just a bit of humble advice for those with little kids who are wondering if they are doing enough…you are! Enjoy your little kiddos…they grow up so quickly. Set down and add up how many years you will be homeschooling…that sum is close to thirty years for me!  No rushing that!…and I don’t want to.  
        

Welcome Home Wednesdays
family · homeschooling · http://schemas.google.com/blogger/2008/kind#post · learning · rabbits

A Shout Out for 4-H!

amandasexton4 Comments

4-H has been a tremendous blessing in our family.  If you are looking for an extra curricular activity that is family friendly and values focused 4-H is a great choice.  September is 4-H enrollment month, and I wanted to highlight the top ten reasons we love 4-H with the goal of sharing this great resource in time for you and your family to consider joining this wonderful organization.  And for those of you who think 4-H is just for families who live in the country or for folks who show livestock…well let me tell you…4-H is for city folk too.  There are countless projects in 4-H that are suitable for any family or individual.

Top 10 Reasons We Love 4-H!

#10  It is economical.  Each member pays $20 for a yearly membership.  An ENTIRE year!

#9  The whole gang (babies and toddlers included) can attend club meetings and project meetings.  4-H does not divide up into grades or age groups.  When competing in certain projects divisions are made for junior, intermediate, and senior individuals and teams.  However, ALL of my daughters attend the same Rabbit project meeting and the same Food and Nutrition meetings.  No running around taking different aged kids to different meetings.  It’s a one stop shop, and I love that!

#8  The 4-H Motto, Pledge, and Prayer says it all.
(Motto)
To Make the Best Better
(Pledge)
I pledge:
My Head to clearer thinking,
My Heart to greater loyalty,
My Hands to larger service, and
My Health to better living,
For my club, my community, my country, and my world.
(Prayer)
“Help me, Oh Lord, to live so that the world may be a little better, because thou hast made me.”

#7 We love healthy competition and the opportunity to learn sportsmanship.  The 4-H sportsmanship motto is this “Keep your head when you win, and your heart when you loose.”  This is the essence of good sportsmanship.

#6  It is focused on teaching life skills.  Agriculture, home economics, public speaking, animal science, science, consumer judging, leadership, fine arts, arts and crafts, and shooting sports are just a few of the self directed projects 4-H offers.  I find that these skills are becoming a lost art in our society.  4-H encourages a hands on education, sort of like a blue collar education.

#5 It is non-religious.  As Orthodox Christians, we sometimes find it difficult to find activities of this sort where we do not feel a little out of sink because of a religious focus or exclusive group mentality.
4-H is inclusive and accepting of all people no matter their religious affiliations.

#4  My husband loves 4-H because it is all about teaching practical skills.  This makes 4-H a true family effort and activity.

#3  It offers a great opportunity for scholarships.  Because of its leadership and community service focus
4-H is a great portfolio builder.  My kids are given leadership and volunteering opportunities through 4-H that I could never provide on my own.

#2  It has given my kids, husband, and I a reason and opportunity to learn and work together.  4-H does not separate our family.  It’s domestic and agricultural focus fits perfectly into a homeschooling family lifestyle.

#1  It is so much fun!  My kids love 4-H, and because of this it is not a struggle to get them to work on projects, practice, or try new things.  My husband and I enjoy watching our kids learn these life skills that encourage the right kind of independence.  The fun we have in 4-H is wholesome and good!

faith · family · parenting · saints

Happy Name Day My Sweet Sophia

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It is an amazing story of love, devotion, and ultimate sacrifice.  A mother and her three daughters…an allegorical challenge to live virtue.  I asked Sophia today if she realized how blessed she was to have Saint Sophia as her saint.  She said yes, but that her story was sad.  In a way, I guess…but even sadder still is a mother who does not try to follow in Saint Sophia’s footsteps.  Lord have mercy.
For a wonderful retelling of this story visit this link:
I love you Sophia, my love in the middle.  Happy Name Day!

The Church celebrates and rejoices in the feast of the three daughters: Faith, Hope, and Love and their Mother Sophia, named for her wisdom: for in them she gave birth to the three godly virtues. Now they eternally behold their bridegroom, God the Word. Let us rejoice spiritually in their memory and cry: O our three Heavenly Protectors, establish, confirm and strengthen us in Faith, Hope and Love. Troparion – Tone 4 

homeschooling · learning · parenting

But really, how do I do this?

amandasexton7 Comments

My life these days is a work in finding a new normal.  After a very difficult pregnancy, I am exhausted.  I guess I did not expect my body to respond this way.  I usually bounce back from pregnancy and c-sections rather quickly…I usually feel so good afterwards.  This time has been different…bed rest I suspect is the culprit.  I feel as if I cannot get a handle on my days yet.  Will I ever be able to manage again?   I say all this to say this,

“Sometimes I do not get it ALL done.  In fact, sometimes this homeschool mom barely scrapes by.”

I have been here before, and I wonder at how I could so easily forget the very thin feeling of barely scraping by.  And then it comes to me.  Instead of feeling a sense of lack, I should be offering thanks.  I know from experience that everything comes together in time and that my anxiety is based on lies…I cannot do this, everything is falling apart, I am not enough.  It is my need to push and perform that is driving this anxiety.  My husband tells me I am beautiful and that I am doing a great job.  Why don’t I believe him?

Today I am trying to give thanks for this very special season and to listen to my husband.  I give thanks for this dirty house and piles of laundry…and school books everywhere…and lunch left out on the bar…and thank you notes to write…and clothes that don’t fit… and pain and exhaustion…and all the wonderful undone of my life right now.  Giving thanks truly is the first step to the question, “How do I do this?”

How do I do this? How do I homeschool in the midst of finding a new normal?  I don’t quite know yet, but I do know what I have done in the past.  I imagine some things will change.  Below is a list of things I do, and some very important things I do not do.  Your situation is different than mine.  Maybe its a move, or unemployment, or illness, or burnout, or whatever.  Whatever you are facing, the task of homeschooling in the midst of daily life can at times be very challenging.  I hope this list is encouraging, perhaps personal, and most importantly honest. Do not give up…I’m not.

Like my daddy used to tell me, “Mandy, you ain’t got no shine.”  His reference to my tomboy undone style was not a criticism.  It was his way of saying he liked my wild hair, and Wrangler blue jeans, and unpolished manners, and happy- to- be- near- you friendliness.  I am getting in touch with that girl today.  There is something very attractive about a woman who seems a little undone, real, gritty, and undeniably happy.  My life is not always picture Pinterest pretty…in fact it never is…but it is red dirt real.  Here is how I do it…the list could go on for miles, below is just a few of the highlights.  

Here is the real dirt…

What I Do…

  • I do the next thing.  That means I just keep going… doing the next task in front of me… trying not to worry about the future.  I say to myself, “This is my task, I do it unto the Lord.”
  • I get up early…when I don’t I see a marked difference in our day.  Getting up early changed my life for the better, and is key to how I get things done…especially homeschooling.
  • I pray alot…the kind of prayer that accompanies me as I go about…while I’m cooking, folding laundry, teaching a reading lesson, playing at the park, or changing soiled sheets in the middle of the night.
  • I keep close to my mother and listen to her advice.
  • I go to the hermitage and talk with my Spiritual Father.
  • I buy quality books and avoid high maintenance curricula.  I have studied and researched to find simple and beautiful books and teaching materials that do not overwhelm me or my kids.  I love to KEEP THINGS SIMPLE. We are a hybrid … a mixed bag of Charlotte Mason/ relational/ unschooling/classical/ Montessori/ style homeschoolers.  I have no idea how to classify what we do, but it works.  
  • I go on dates with my husband.  This is crucial for me and my husband.
  • I ask my husband’s advice and try to listen to his practical solutions to problems that arise.  His level headed, but sometimes difficult to accept advice helps me to keep things real.  He is my number one go to for help.
  • I have one good friend that I share my days and secrets with.  I do not have the energy or time to maintain more friendships, and this makes the one I have very special and enjoyable to me. 
  • I write.  Whether I am blogging, journaling, sketching a scene for my novel, or just running a dialogue in my head, I am always writing.  I sometimes have a hard time justifying the time I spend blogging, but so far I have managed to keep my blogging about writing which is why I began blogging in the first place.  Writing helps me wrap my brain around my life and inspires me to live intentionally.  It helps me be a better mother, wife, and person.  I organize my thoughts when I write, and this frees me to homeschool from my heart.  Writing is crucial for me.  
  • I schedule schoolwork by the week and not the month or year.  I realize that this is impossible for some people, but it is the only system that works for me.  In fact, I may not write anything down at all until after we have done it.  My curriculum planner is more like a journal…it gets filled up as we accomplish things.  I have grade level book lists, math and grammar spines, and a general idea of the seasonal projects I would like to do, and then I just go about doing the next thing.  This gives me the freedom to follow my kid’s interests and accommodate special needs.  I love this way of homeschooling.
  • I enrolled my older kids in an online homeschool program.  This has been wonderful.  It was time to let them go a little bit so that I can concentrate on the littles.  For high school subjects that are very teacher intensive I purchase curriculum that comes with lectures, solution manuals, and built in schedules and grading.  This is great for math and science.  Take a look at DIVE.
  • I drink coffee…
  • I cook to unwind…
  • I listen to all kinds of music…
  • I laugh out loud and try not to take myself so seriously…
  • I dance in the kitchen with my kids…
  • I say sorry when I am wrong (and that is often).
  • I take naps when I can.
  • I plan meals a week at a time and shop with a grocery list.  I cannot manage once a month shopping, even if it would save me a weekly trip to the store.  I have grocery lists and menus set up in Excel, and I print and highlight.  This helps alot!  (This is an area where I am struggling right now.)
  • I never expect the laundry basket to be entirely empty…it NEVER is!
  • I plan dinner at breakfast and get it started.  (Another routine that I am struggling to resume.)
  • I expect the unexpected and I try to be at peace with interruptions and distractions.
  • I try to be gentle.

    What I don’t do…
                 

  • I do not schedule my day in half hour segments…please spare me the guilt.  I just follow a rhythm of morning, afternoon, and evening routine.
  • I do not knit or sew, or hang around people that do…just joking, but really I am not cut from the crafty mold.  My mom, the artist, gave up on me long ago.  I am a lost cause.
  • I do not own an iPhone, iPad, iPod, or any other handheld device beginning with i.  If I did, I would be the worst addict of all.  Better keep the cookie in the cookie jar.
  •  I do not cook gourmet organic meals.  I love to cook, and I love to eat.  However, I do not stress about organic.  I pray this prayer instead, “ if they should drink anything deadly, it will never harm them.”  I buy lots of fruit and veggies, and I cook healthy meals the best I can.  Regular veggies are better than no veggies, right?
  • I do not apologize for not answering the phone during the daytime rush hours.
  • I do not pretend to know the first thing about extreme couponing…I tried it once and ended up in the hole.
  • I do not give grades…we just keep at something until it is mastered.
  • I do not read blogs that make me feel like pond scum…you know the ones.  If they ain’t real..they ain’t worth my time.
  •  I do not ask advice from people who have no clue of my situation.
  • I do not exercise in the wee hours of the morning…I feel like active housework is all I can manage right now.  In time, I would like to resume my neighborhood walks.
  • I do not micro-manage my two older students.  They basically handle their own schedule and online classes.  This gives me the opportunity to be with my littles.
  • I do not put make-up on everyday.  In fact, I have become a make-up minimalist over the years.  I rarely wear it, and when I do it consists of mascara, a little cover up under the eyes, a soft blush, and a shear lip gloss. 
  • I do not make my own bread.  I make artisan bread, an occasional sour dough bread in the bread machine, and quick breads, and that’s about the extent of my homemade bread making.  
  • I do not do co-ops.  We have in the past, and they were wonderful when all of my kids were younger in regard to socialization and fun.  However, I cannot manage teaching a class outside my own home at this stage in our family, and the tuition based co-op near us has not offered a class selection that I deemed worthy of our precious time.  Co-ops are very time and energy consuming, and I always weigh if the cost is worth the effort.  In the past it has worked for us, but right now I have decided to stay home and spend my energies elsewhere.
  • I do not keep a perfect house.  I like to get up and put order to the house before school starts.  This seems to frame our day and keep things running smoother.  In times past I have set up a daily cleaning schedule, and this worked great for a season.  However, I find that we have come into a stage where I will need to do a once a week cleaning on Saturday, and leave the weekdays open.  I want to be available as this is vital to relational learning, and this is impossible if I am anal about housework and order.  I have to accept this new normal. 

I could go on and on, but really anyone can homeschool, and homeschool well.  I get comments all the time from mothers who claim that they could never homeschool.  I believe them, if their image of homeschooling is this perfect little home, with perfect little children, a perfect little school room, a perfect supportive husband, and perfect days filled with learning and adventure.  NOBODY can do that!

However, anyone can share their days with their children…anyone can live life with their children…anyone can learn and grow as a homeschool family…anyone can DO THIS!  The trick is to look to the Lord and keep grounded in the heart.  Never compare, and never assume that life is perfect for any homeschool family.  We all struggle, and we all have areas where we shine.

Welcome Home Wednesdays

           

    cooking · food

    Roasted Chicken & Cantaloupe Salsa

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    I roasted a chicken in my favorite dutch oven, and then I shredded it.  I planned on making chicken salad for later in the week, but that never materialized.  Today during our 4-H Food and Nutrition meeting the girls made this yummy Cantaloupe Salsa, and I decided to top the savory chicken with this refreshing garnish.  It was really yummy paired with a Dos Equis Lager.  Enjoy a last bit of summer harvest!   


    Cantaloupe Salsa
     2.5 cups cantaloupe, finely diced (about 1/2 large cantaloupe)
     1 cup red onion, finely diced
     2 jalapenos, seeded and minced 
    1/4 cup cilantro, chopped
     juice of 1 lime salt to taste

    books

    We never had a governess…

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    Pride and Prejudice Chapter 29

    Elizabeth felt all the impertinence of her questions, but answered them very composedly. — Lady Catherine then observed,
    “Your father’s estate is entailed on Mr. Collins, I think. For your sake,” turning to Charlotte, “I am glad of it; but otherwise I see no occasion for entailing estates from the female line. — It was not thought necessary in Sir Lewis de Bourgh’s family. — Do you play and sing, Miss Bennet?”
    “A little.”
    “Oh! then — some time or other we shall be happy to hear you. Our instrument is a capital one, probably superior to — You shall try it some day. — Do your sisters play and sing?”
    “One of them does.”
    “Why did not you all learn? — You ought all to have learned. The Miss Webbs all play, and their father has not so good an income as your’s. — Do you draw?”
    “No, not at all.”
    “What, none of you?”
    “Not one.”
    “That is very strange. But I suppose you had no opportunity. Your mother should have taken you to town every spring for the benefit of masters.”
    “My mother would have had no objection, but my father hates London.”
    “Has your governess left you?”
    “We never had any governess.”
    “No governess! How was that possible? Five daughters brought up at home without a governess! — I never heard of such a thing. Your mother must have been quite a slave to your education.”
    Elizabeth could hardly help smiling, as she assured her that had not been the case.
    “Then, who taught you? who attended to you? Without a governess you must have been neglected.”
    “Compared with some families, I believe we were; but such of us as wished to learn, never wanted the means. We were always encouraged to read, and had all the masters that were necessary. Those who chose to be idle, certainly might.”

    books

    I never saw such a woman…

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    Pride and Prejudice Chapter 8

    Elizabeth was so much caught by what passed, as to leave her very little attention for her book; and soon laying it wholly aside, she drew near the card-table, and stationed herself between Mr. Bingley and his eldest sister to observe the game.
    “Is Miss Darcy much grown since the spring?” said Miss Bingley; “will she be as tall as I am?”
    “I think she will. She is now about Miss Elizabeth Bennet’s height, or rather taller.”
    “How I long to see her again! I never met with anybody who delighted me so much. Such a countenance, such manners, and so extremely accomplished for her age! Her performance on the piano-forte is exquisite.”
    “It is amazing to me,” said Bingley, “how young ladies can have patience to be so very accomplished as they all are.”
    “All young ladies accomplished! My dear Charles, what do you mean?”
    “Yes all of them, I think. They all paint tables, cover skreens, and net purses. I scarcely know any one who cannot do all this, and I am sure I never heard a young lady spoken of for the first time, without being informed that she was very accomplished.”
    “Your list of the common extent of accomplishments,” said Darcy, “has too much truth. The word is applied to many a woman who deserves it no otherwise than by netting a purse, or covering a skreen. But I am very far from agreeing with you in your estimation of ladies in general. I cannot boast of knowing more than half a dozen, in the whole range of my acquaintance, that are really accomplished.”
    “Nor I, I am sure,” said Miss Bingley.
    “Then,” observed Elizabeth, “you must comprehend a great deal in your idea of an accomplished women.”
    “Yes; I do comprehend a great deal in it.”
    “Oh! certainly,” cried his faithful assistant, “no one can be really esteemed accomplished, who does not greatly surpass what is usually met with. A woman must have a thorough knowledge of music, singing, drawing, dancing, and the modern languages, to deserve the word; and besides all this, she must possess a certain something in her air and manner of walking, the tone of her voice, her address and expressions, or the word will be but half deserved.”
    “All this she must possess,” added Darcy, “and to all this she must yet add something more substantial, in the improvement of her mind by extensive reading.”
    “I am no longer surprised at your knowing only six accomplished women. I rather wonder now at your knowing any.”
    “Are you so severe upon your own sex, as to doubt the possibility of all this?”
    “I never saw such a woman, I never saw such capacity, and taste, and application, and elegance, as you describe, united.”
    Mrs. Hurst and Miss Bingley both cried out against the injustice of her implied doubt, and were both protesting that they knew many women who answered this description, when Mr. Hurst called them to order, with bitter complaints of their inattention to what was going forward. As all conversation was thereby at an end, Elizabeth soon afterwards left the room.

    I never saw such a woman….such wisdom.  I keep Elizabeth always in my mind as I raise my daughters.  Pride and prejudice… it is a constant struggle.